Ridiculous Mavis

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I am ridiculous. I am not Mavis.
I'm Frances, in fact. I have a particularly redundant degree in Ancient and Medieval History, a Lego pirate ship and a terrible addiction to Coca Cola. I play Guitar Hero very ill indeed.

April 17, 2014 at 10:24pm
196 notes
Reblogged from skarver

skarver:

sexual orientation: mean, angry lesbians

(via relax-o-vision)

Irked fans produce fanfic like irritated oysters produce pearls.

— 

Jacqueline Lichtenberg in Fic by Anne Jamison (via treizquatorz)

Love it.

(via marybegone)

OMG, the next fanfic gathering or workshop or blog should totally be called The Irritated Oyster.  I’m getting bunnies for the logo as I type. 

(via drinkingcocoa-tpp)

(via stavingdarkness)

9:12pm
30,890 notes
Reblogged from altlitgossip

bearsonhoverboards:

megachikorita:

tharook:

kissmyasuka:

altlitgossip:

'do u believe in lief after loev' by Caden Lovelace

im so mad because this is going to get picked up as like. a post-post-modern masterpiece. academics will shit themselves for this

I want this book.

i bought this book and let me tell you it is every bit as good as it looks theres an entire part thats about historical elephants listed alphabetically and its dedicated to the authors followers

This is the greatest thing I have ever seen

(via tumblingduck)

8:36pm
1,229 notes
Reblogged from stalungrad

[T]here are female Conservative MPs who are happy to call themselves feminists. Why, they even wear T-shirts saying that they’re feminists, just so that we know. I saw a photo of Theresa May wearing one, right, and on the front, it said, ‘This is what a feminist looks like.’ And on the back of her one, it said, ‘Not really! I’m a Tory!’ And then underneath that, it said, ‘I axed the Health In Pregnancy Grant. I closed Sure Start Centres.’ That one had a smiley face next to it. ‘I cut child benefit and slashed tax credits. I shut down shelters for battered wives and children. I cut rape counselling and legal aid.’ Winking face. ‘I closed down all twenty-three specialist domestic violence courts. I cut benefits for disabled children. I tried to amend the Abortion Act so that women received one-to-one abortion counselling from the Pope before they go ahead with it. LOL.’ The back is much longer than the front, by the way. It’s a tailcoat, basically. The new Tory feminists are wearing tailcoats.

— Bridget Christie, episode 2 of Radio 4’s Bridget Christie Minds The Gap (via stalungrad)

(via ladysaviours)

April 16, 2014 at 11:20pm
29 notes
Reblogged from newballsplease

newballsplease:

image

captainlitebrite:

a self-portrait

(via tumblingduck)

9:30pm
1,415 notes
Reblogged from karasquirrel

(Source: karasquirrel, via wanderthewood)

According to the Guardian’s early review of Captain America: The Winter Soldier, it’s the first time Black Widow has got to be an “actual character” rather than a “voluptuous female mascot.” Unfortunately, chief Guardian critic Peter Bradshaw’s follow-up was a little less sure of this, with Black Widow then being described as a “leather-clad… ass-kicking ex-Soviet adventuress whose auburn hairstyle is matched by her distinctive fake tan-type maquillage and restrained ochre lipstick.”

I’m glad he told us about her makeup routine, because otherwise that description would teach us next to nothing about her character.

In the Independent, Black Widow is a “sultry femme fatale,” although the Telegraph gives her the inaccurate but far more positive rating of “the most (the first?) complex female role in the Avengers franchise to date.” Apparently he failed to notice Pepper Potts (40-year-old tech company CEO), the four central female characters of the Thor movies, Peggy Carter (World War II intelligence agent), Maria Hill (deputy director of an international spy agency), and half the main cast of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.

This is just a casual look at some of the newspaper reviews in the UK, where Captain America: The Winter Soldier has already been out for a week. When the movie is released in the U.S. on April 4, you can expect more of the same from American reviewers. The general consensus so far is that Black Widow, a character who receives almost as much screentime as Captain America himself, is only worth describing in terms of her appearance, and then only for about one sentence in a multi-paragraph review.

Just for kicks, I took a look at the top reviews for The Avengers, to see what America’s most acclaimed and respected cinema critics thought of Black Widow back in 2012. Bear in mind that most of these quotes are the only description of Scarlett Johansson’s performance in the entire review.

[….]

The Chicago Tribune’s Michael Phillips went for that old favorite, “leather-clad,” while Salon’s Andrew O’Hehir didn’t even bother to beat around the bush, describing, “Scarlett Johansson in a catsuit… cocking her head just so as if to acknowledge that she’s the idealized fetish object of the 11-year-old boy within every so-called adult male.” Idealized fetish object.

Time Out didn’t even bother referring to Black Widow by name, joking that Johansson’s superhero persona was “Distracting Catsuit.” By comparison, the comments from the Hollywood Reporter (“a sultry, scarlet-haired assassin”) and Village Voice (“ass-kicking all-purpose Girl Friday”) seem positively feminist.

If you feel like playing film critic misogyny bingo when America’s first round of Winter Soldier reviews are published this week, I recommend looking out for the phrases “leather-clad” and “ass-kicker.” These are an easy way to weed out any reviewers who weren’t paying attention to the movie, because neither phrase describes Black Widow’s actual role.

[…..]

Spider-Man’s spandex costume is probably more salacious, but I’m pretty sure he doesn’t wind up being described as an homme fatale by anyone with a Pulitzer.

[….] Apparently the mere concept of Scarlett Johansson in a tight outfit is so dazzlingly erotic that it bypasses some male reviewers’ conscious minds and causes them to ignore everything she says and does for the rest of the movie. The result is a series of reviews from highly respected film critics who, given the opportunity to describe each Avenger in a single sentence, replace Black Widow’s summary with the announcement, “I AM A HETEROSEXUAL MAN AND SCARLETT JOHANSSON’S BOOBS ARE AWESOME.”

Captain America, Thor, and the Winter Soldier have all filmed shirtless scenes (in Thor’s case, purely for eye candy purposes on both occasions), and Cap’s everyday outfit of choice is a white T-shirt several sizes too small for his bulging torso. Yet oddly enough, reviewers somehow manage to discuss those characters on their own terms, rather than reducing them to their component body parts and costumes.

[….]

Sadly, there’s very little sign of this character in the most easily accessible reviews of both The Avengers and Winter Soldier. Judging by the Guardian, WSJ, or New Yorker, Black Widow is more like a blow-up doll with a black belt. By their logic, if she’s wearing a tight outfit, then she must be a sexy ass-kicker, meaning that she must be the token female character, and therefore is little more than eye candy.

With that thought process in mind, it must make perfect sense to relegate Black Widow to a single sniggering comment about her catsuit, because obviously Scarlett Johansson is just there for decoration. And if you’ve read in the New York Times that Black Widow is a token female character, then chances are you’ll have internalized that opinion before you even buy a ticket. The feedback loop of misogynist preconceptions continues on, and in the end, we all lose out.

[….]

Marvel has spent several years teasing fans with the possibility of a Black Widow solo movie, which Scarlett Johansson has already said she’d be very happy to do. Luckily, she’s already well prepared for the inevitable influx of reviews that will expend a paragraph describing her body and “leather” catsuit before moving onto the substance of the film.

In an interview with Esquire magazine in 2006, Johansson was already grimly amused by being awarded the dubious honor of being Sexiest Woman Alive. “You work hard making independent films for fourteen years and you get voted Best Breasts,” she said. “What about my brain? What about my heart? What about my kidneys and my gallbladder?”

The interviewer, apparently unaware of the irony, followed this up by writing, “There is, no doubt, a fetish Website devoted to Scarlett’s gallbladder — which, by the way, fellas, is all natural.”

You just can’t win.

— 

Every review of Black Widow in ‘Captain America’ is wrong

(via samswilsons)

(Source: adathranduil, via everythingsbetterwithbisexuals)

April 15, 2014 at 10:16pm
617 notes
Reblogged from christinelinnell

fullofstoryshapes:

christinelinnell:

I hate it when writers of love stories go out of their way to tell me There’s No Such Thing As Fairytale Endings In This Sad World.

It’s like, yes, thank you for that depressing, cynical slap of reality, it is totally why I read love stories in the first place. I am truly wiser for hearing it and repent of my silly romantic notions.

(Oops, no I don’t, screw you.)

 (via longjackets)

(via ladysaviours)

On Poverty

paullicino:

Disclaimer: I have been trying to write this for almost a year and I’m tremendously dissatisfied with the result. It is three and a half thousand words long and has been drafted and revised so many times that I give up and release it from this endless, painful gestation.

I have never owned a table.

Sure, the place I live in has a table. It’s a glass table and it’s considerably better than the slightly wobbly wooden table in the previous place I lived in but, being glass, I’m perpetually terrified it will break and then I’ll have to pay for it. Then I’ll have paid for a table and still never have actually owned one.

I couldn’t tell you how much a table costs, but I did buy the cheapest and most basic desk for £50 once. I have a feeling I’d be charged a lot more than that if this table broke.

That philosophy extends to everything around me where I live, where I have lived: I don’t own it, but I will be paying for it if something goes wrong. There is a special sort of added excitement to this, since most of the places I’ve lived in have had all sorts of things wrong with them already, things from faulty electrics to ill-fitting windows to no doors that will close properly anywhere, that are never addressed. I’ve feared these things as well because I’ve wondered if I’m going to be the tenant who is deemed to be responsible for them, particularly because landladies and landlords seem to be curiously divorced from the properties they own. They always live far away, or they’re out of town or they’re overseas again. One landlady looked around a flat I was renting from her with surprise and awe and bafflement, failing to recognise many of its features.

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candyred:

we’re making memes out of old memes the very concept of a meme is wrapping around itself into this eternal meme paradox i cant even tell whats ironic anymore and i am very afraid

(Source: matatagihayato, via patchypellets)

April 14, 2014 at 11:12pm
27,446 notes
Reblogged from sodomymcscurvylegs

sodomymcscurvylegs:

The cognitive dissonance caused by a society that tells its children to “follow their dreams” through messages in films, literature, etc. and then punishes them for not choosing safe, money making careers in adulthood is fascinating, to say the least.

(via 1909vintage)

riverdoctor:

goodbye warehouse 13 ↪ 3/6 characters

What kind of advice is “be yourself”? Artie, that’s the worst advice I’ve ever heard. Because “myself” is a giant freakazoid with no past and no real interests outside of my Top Secret Job which I can’t talk about. Oh, AND, I like onions!

(Source: oldtimeswellsandbering, via patchypellets)

partytimexelent:

Dancing with the Klingons (x)

Not just any dancing. That’s MJ. XD

(Source: lucystillintheskywithdiamonds, via amazonpoodle)

8:48pm
468 notes
Reblogged from marymorstens

marymorstens:

musical theatre has taught me to sing in more languages than i can speak

(via maladiesandremedies)